18 d’octubre 2009

Failures, successes

I once work at a pizzeria.
As a bachelor educated preppy girl I thought all I was going to find was a bunch of barrio people, the ones who find tossing a pizza a serious employment.
Nothing far from reality. Our pizza maker had a certification and was a pizza turning champion.
Silly to put it like this now, but for everybody but me she was like a big hero and I was slowly getting contagious from the overall "she is a master in pizzas" feeling.
My job was to deliver them. The first and only pizza deliver girl in the city.
Needless to say, that even provided a map, and in my neighbourhhood, my orientation problems won over my effectiveness in delivering pizzas on time. Also needless to say I had great fun biking around the barrio and enjoying the serious stress everybody had getting orders and delivering on time. Not that I couldn't be bothered, but I was indulging myself being understanding of my handicap. Funny enough and worth a study, people on, say, less advantaged areas were the ones ordering pizzas. Yeah, ok, I lived in a more high standard area, they probably go to proper pizzerias there if pizza is an option for an evening casual meal.
Anything around the more messy barrios was outer space for me.
Anyway, first failure. Ever. Despite my efforts not getting lost all_the_time, they didn't renovate my contract there.
For a higher educated preppy girl, working in a 0 intellectual effort job it was a failure (though getting around is already challenging for me. Whatever your views on my intelligence, it just works fine in very limited areas... The pizza delivering experience showed.)

More?? After that I worked in a computer company. I was good enough as the previous girl didn't know what a mouse was. User-oriented computer skills aside (which were quite decent at my age) I never, ever managed to keep all stuff in place. My job was to control in and outs of the stuff (yeah, like I am going to telly tell if someone was late), schedules, working progress, orders and, oh I hated it, taking calls, many many calls of things I didn't even know of. My failure was not being able to manage the call forwarding system and never knowing where people where. And of course not being able to play 'big brother' on my colleagues.
Ah, besides I was in the high flat leeching stage with my then-boyfriend and of course not getting any sleep at all ;-0, so all I remember was me being completely tired after 2 hours sleep, smoking like a champion and taking my break in a near mall to *sigh* nick some gorgeous dresses to show off when arriving home. Naughty girl.

More to it: I worked for the company of a friend. Lawyers. Delivering court cases, following on documents first hand (remember Internet was not there, so I was the e-mail sender). NO failure, but goodness, so clueless of instances and whatever all these docs meant, I really had to keep a cheat sheet to know what the hell I was talking about.

This all about failures. But wait for the successes, because they get more interesting.

The area I have first succeeded in is... prrrrrooom! Child care.
Amazing how someone not particularly moved by kiddies has made a freaking difference on them. No modesty. My skills on child psychology are intuitionist and surprisingly effective. I could handle any little bastard. Well, I am very affective, but merciless on their child quality, and maybe that distance, in which you don't stimulate kids as retards kinda worked.
And besides until God knows when and why, I have always been very close to my inner child, so with them I was on an equal level.

More to successes. Jobs related to the outer image. Shit and this is annoying. Whatever involves looking like a doll works. Using my language assets of course, but I have been a pole dancer, so go figure... My failure there was not being able to fake bimboness. i would have made a career otherwise. I suck at small talk and flirtatious emptiness. But believe me you have to be really smart to pretend you are dum. Ergo, I am not really smart. Or really pretty. So I guess I was trying to balance between the two of them.
But I have the moves... Pff, ok, enough.
And working on events. My extroversion always helped me. Although again my soft skills are questionable. But seems the combination of my outer grotesque+dressed like a doll+world knowledge made it to make a good impression. Fools, i know how to behave... for a while until you get me interested in something and I forget the role I am playing.


There you go 2 great skills: child care and pole dancing... Am I balanced or what?

Just a thought after loosing a job on skills I kinda lost interest on. But I am really happy I acquire. Until at some point I couldn't see the colours of it, the excitement.
In the end what I am best at is language teaching. It combines the theatrical bit, my motivation to share, the lack of small talk (anything you say can be valuable and absorved), being in touch with humans and the patience skills.

Anyway, that's how far I got from my memories back in the pizza days.

Today's feelings.

- There is someone here who is going to wake me up early in the morning. And I so not fancy it.
- All the others are just asleep. Multiplying by 0 doesn't take a mathematician.
Even I can do it!