I have been out and about for a while already, Spain, Portugal, Germany and preparing to the days to come. Almost 3 months without being able to take a break and leave for a while.
The feeling of coming back after leaving behind other habits is great for the first hours, you have complete control over everything. After the first nap it gets boring.
The things you have in your to do list will be done, and there is no next day of work. That means to me handling without planned stress. I don’t know if many people would understand the concept. Imagine you have to wake up early the next morning. My planned stress tells me that I have to get as many hours of sleep as possible and that is why any other activity not bed related supposes an extra body effort. This is my state today. I know I have to wake up at 6 the next morning and there is nothing I can get to do without thinking about it. I guess it is not understandable if you follow a Monday to Friday schedule. But part of my life right now turns around the fact that I am constantly changing my working hours. I love it. Makes me feel it is part of a biological chaos. And I am addicted to sleeping, which allows me to sleep constatly under the excuse “I have to work nights”or “I have to recover from shifts”.
Nough said. Just to reflect that yesterday I was able to drive from Germany, get an hour of sleep, chat with my new flatmate, go shopping, fix some food, wash the car and I would have been able to stretch a bit if I wouldn’t have dedicated the hour left to do that, what women so very much like: talk.
I parked the car in a nearby alley and picked my bike to go back home. On the way home, the air was clean and warm. I was sitting on my fat saddle, in an almost upright position, being able to observe my environment, see the people rushing to work and me confirming to be happy to believe to this shifting pattern, being off on a Wednesday and a Thursday, I kept pedalling with the feeling of having completed a mission… Sweet!
But the usual dread of being up here is back today. I have no internet and will probably post this as soon as I remember to save it in a memory stick I cannot find at the moment. Neither I can find my headphones, the washing is spread on the bed and I cannot believe I have to go to work again. I don’t have enough colourful pens to do my idiot-proof studying and I just came back from the shops where I bought myself another miniskirt I won’t wear.
In overall I love my bed, I could just lay down and not do anything until waking up, if I didn’t have to change the sheets and fold all the washing that is resting on top of it. In the kitchen the new bin’s box is in the middle of it, the instructions on the floor and a map of the world waiting to be hung. I really don’t know where to start with. So I write about it. And deliver proof.
On top of it is dark and cold again as if summer would have been a dream.
My biological built in rechargeable sun battery is running low. Another thing only understandable by people born and raised under the sun. At least I now found a logical explanation to winter depression.
I don't want to loose my south...
